Are You Programmed For Success…Or Failure
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Have you ever wondered why some people just have it all? They’re well liked by everyone they meet, financially set and attractive…but what stands out most is their beaming sense of self-confidence when they enter a room.
It’s almost as if they have a certain “presence” that gives off positive vibes.
Not everyone is this fortunate, however. There are people who are faced with low self worth, they struggle to maintain positive relationships and often feel resentful towards people who are better off than they are.
So what’s the difference? How can one person be so incredibly successful while another person constantly struggles just to get by?
The answer lies in what I call your “Invisible Lifestyle.” Your Invisible Lifestyle is what made you into the person you are today. You were literally “programmed” with the habits and beliefs that you follow today (or refuse to follow).
So who were the programmers?
Look no further than your very own parents or guardians.
It’s true. Your parents unknowingly “programmed” you to become the person you are today. The reason I say ‘unknowingly’ is because your parents raised you the best they could based on how their parents raised THEM.
Because of the “brain wiring” of your original programmers (your parents), as an adult, you are duplicating the way they lived when you were young.
For example, let’s say you were raised in a household where both of your parents were always there for you. They took an interest and encouraged you in everything you pursued.
You grew up seeing your parents work hard every day, take interest in you and treat each other with respect. As a result, you grew up to have a successful career and a happy marriage because you worked hard and treated your spouse with respect…just like your parents.
Now let’s look at another scenario…
Imagine a life where you grew up in a neglectful household. Your parents never encouraged you or took an interest in anything you did…EVER.
Your father had a negative outlook on life because of HIS traumatic childhood so all he knew how to do was raise YOU the same way that his father raised HIM.
As a result, you grew up with a negative outlook on life (just like your dad), and you have low self esteem because nobody took the time to encourage you and take an interest in you as a child.
Is this YOUR fault? NO! Of course not!
You did not ask to be “dropped” into your parents’ household. That is the “hand” you were dealt in life and now, as an adult, you’re living out the consequences.
In these two scenarios, you’re living out what I call “Invisible Lifestyle A”.
A stands for “ALWAYS”
“What you didn’t notice your parents doing as a child, you are faithfully reproducing today, and you don’t have a clue you’re doing it.”
But there IS one exception to this phenomenon…
Let’s say you grew up in a bad neighborhood with an alcoholic father. Everywhere you looked, you saw poverty, crime and hopelessness. As a child, you couldn’t wait to move out of the house. You saw your parents’ lifestyle and were DETERMINED to not only be successful, but be NOTHING LIKE YOUR PARENTS.
While you were growing up, you took the necessary steps to put yourself through school and as an adult; you have a positive self image and do everything within your power to remain financially stable.
This is known as Invisible Lifestyle B.
B stands for “BUCKING”
“What you couldn’t stand your parents doing when you grew up; you won’t stand for in your relationships today.”
Those who embrace the “B” Lifestyle, do so in defiance of their family’s values. The B Lifestyle can create the “black sheep of the family” and that goes for highly troubled families or very successful ones.
Invisible Lifestyle B has taken place when an inner city boy or girl goes on to pursue a successful career as a lawyer while each of their siblings end up in jail. On the other hand, a child from a wealthy family could go against his parents’ values by recklessly spending and eventually filing for bankruptcy as an adult.
Now I’m not telling you to place BLAME on your parents. Your parents raised you based on everything they knew at the time. It’s ALL they knew. It’s not their fault…it’s NOBODY’S “FAULT”.
The key is to understand and accept the fact that the negative values you absorbed from your parents (i.e., fear of failure, low self worth, jealousy) are programs literally “wired” into your brain.
And if you have enough discontent with these, it is very possible to change that programming in your adult life.
But simply knowing this is not enough.
You must find these programs and learn how to “decommission” them. In other words, you need to know what to do and how to do it, especially if these programs seem to dictate your behavior.
Do you do things over and over that other people might call “self sabotage”?
Are you attracted to a certain type of person you know you shouldn’t be around, yet you can’t help but feel attracted to?
The source of this behavior is one or two negative programs from your childhood.
These programs will prevent you (or your loved ones) from a better life.
If your parents’ programmed you with some negative values that are causing you problems in your life today…it’s NOT your fault…but it IS your responsibility to do something about it.
You can start by thinking about how each situation in your life today is directly affected by your Invisible Lifestyle.
The more you discuss your childhood memories of the way things were, the more you become consciously aware of them and the easier they will be to “decommission”.
Over an entire lifetime, most people will not make the connection between their behavior as an adult and how their parents lived during their childhood.
They will accept their parent’s values without questioning anything, never knowing the REAL reason they continue to make the same mistakes over and over again.
But now YOU know better than that. Don’t live your life with a blindfold on. Create a better future by first identifying and then eliminating the values from your parents that are causing you trouble today.
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Weight Motivation
Weight Motivation
Proper weight motivation can be the difference between success and failure to your weight loss goals. It should be noted that the key to a successful exercise program is perseverance. This means that you need to commit to it for the long haul—in fact, it is best if you commit to it for the rest of your life. Certainly, it can be difficult at times. But in the end, it is well worth the effort you exert.
Staying motivated may begin with having a tangible goal. For instance, if you are basically inactive when you start your program, you should aim to burn off 500 calories a week. If you are fairly active when you start exercising, your goal should be 1,000 calories. But you must also have a long-term goal. This might be doubling the amount of calories you burn within six months of commencing your exercise program.
You might consider starting an exercise log. Here, you will record exactly what kind of aerobic, anaerobic, and stretching exercises you do each week. Be sure to include the number of repetitions you’re performing with each exercise. This way, you’ll have a concrete chart for your progress. Seeing how well you’re doing can be truly inspiring and can keep you going when you find it difficult to go on.
Another effective weight motivational strategy is to join a group that engages in some kind of exercise. For instance, you might become a mall-walker or you might find a local square dance club to join. Other possibilities include hiking groups, golfing groups, softball teams, or even ping-pong teams. The fact that you are part of a social network will help to keep you motivated.
You might try psyching yourself out by using a computer screensaver which says, “Get moving.” Or you might post a “get moving” sign on your refrigerator. In other words, you should be constantly reminded of the value of exercise. You might also invest in home exercise equipment such as a treadmill, elliptical trainer, or free weights. The amount of money you spend could be a powerful incentive for making sure that you use the equipment on a regular basis. You should also place the equipment in a prominent place so that you have to pass it often. After a while, you’ll find no excuse not to exercise.
You might also consider investing in exercise videos or DVDs. These allow you the convenience of exercising in the privacy of your own home. They can also give you an electronic “exercise buddy” who can help keep you inspired even on rainy days when you don’t feel like exercising at all.
Another effective idea is to place your athletic shoes near the door so that you are reminded of the need to walk rather than drive. You might also consider rewarding yourself for keeping with your exercise program. Your reward could be as elaborate as a cruise or as small as a treat from the dollar store. The idea is to make sure that your accomplishment is celebrated.
While we’re on the topic of celebration, seriously consider throwing a party once you’ve reached an exercise milestone. You can serve nutritious snacks and beverages and even encourage your guests to come in their athletic wear in order to build upon the party’s theme. Sharing your joy can help to motivate you to continue your physical activities.
It should be said that there is no right way to exercise. But you do need to make sure that whatever you do is effective and that you’re sufficiently motivated to do it. By following just a few simple tips, you can ensure that your exercise routine is not just a fad, that it will continue over the long term. Remember that you may face setbacks from time to time, but that shouldn’t stop you from continuing to try to reach your exercise goals. Just keep in mind that the goal of weight motivation is to cause a permanent healthy lifestyle with natural weight loss.
Categories: Motivation Tags: weight loss, weight loss motivation, weight loss tips, weight motivation
Pursue Your Dreams With Passion
Pursue your dreams at all cost. I am reminded of Will Smith in The Pursuit of Happyness. When he realized he had discouraged his son’s dream, he encouraged his son by telling him to protect any dream he had and not to allow anyone to steal it. I think that message is crucial for us today as well. With the state of the economy, uncertainty is more certain than anything else. We all need the confidence that a better tomorrow is possible.
So what’s your dream? We all have one. What is the one thing or maybe a few things you would love to do? For me, my dream is to be a #1 New York Times bestselling author. My dream is to create training materials for prisoners, young men in juvenile facilities and inmates recently released from prison. My dream is to make a difference in the lives of others. My dream, like Les Brown says it, is to make a statement with my life.
I realize how easy it is to read something inspiring and fail to take the necessary action that will lead change. I want you to do something for yourself. Take out a sheet of paper and write down (ONE) thing you would like to achieve or accomplish this month.
It’s sometimes difficult to dream big when the pressures of life are weighing on us. That’s why I want you to choose one small goal you can work on everyday. Choose something that will propel you forward due to it’s importance to you. I am here to validate within you that any goal of any size is totally possible for you to achieve.
Breaking down huge goals into bite sized steps is the quickest way to build your self confidence while moving closer to your dreams.
As you pursue your dreams, just know that I believe in you and your success.
Pursue your dreams and don’t allow anyone to steal your dream.
Categories: Motivation Tags: dreams, goals, Pursue Your Dreams, vision